Break-ups are hard, regardless of whether you initiated it or not. It may be difficult transitioning from spending every moment with someone to suddenly not seeing or hearing from that person at all. However, breaking up can actually have beneficial aspects. Ending a relationship with someone can give you the space that you may have been deprived of when in the relationship. You may find that you have more time for yourself, which you can spend taking care of yourself physically, mentally, and emotionally.

When trying to get over your past relationship, you should avoid things that remind you of your ex. Stay away from visiting their social network profiles, passing by where they live or places where they might be, or reading old text messages or e-mails from them. The best way to get over an old relationship is to accept that it’s best for you and your ex to move on. Later on, when things settle down, maybe you and your ex can become friends. It’s better to look at the break-up as an opportunity to explore new interests or reconnect with friends rather than focusing on the loss of the relationship.

Reaching Out For Help:

If it has been some time since your break-up and you’re still feeling down, so down that you are having trouble taking care of yourself or focusing in school or work; or if you find yourself continuously and frequently asking, How do I find happiness? How can I move on? Is there anything ahead for me? Try following some of these tips:

Talk to a friend. Admitting feeling pain after a break-up may seem embarrassing, but holding it all inside can make things worse. Talking about it can really help you feel better, as can writing down your thoughts and feelings in a journal.

Reach out to a counselor. Counselors are trained to help people work through difficult times such as after a break-up. As much as you may want to figure it all out on our own, sometimes you just need the help of a professional. Make a call to your school’s counseling center to make an appointment to speak with someone. You can also find a professional in your community by using the SAMHSA referral and provider link to find mental health services near you, or call 1-800-273-TALK (8255) to have a confidential conversation with someone who can give you suggestions for getting help in your area.

Be active. Just getting up and being active can make you feel better and can be a big part of moving on. If you’re having trouble finding the motivation, take it slow – start with a casual walk around the block.

Stay healthy. If you are using drugs and alcohol to try and deal with the pain of a break-up, speak up and get help. You aren’t alone and you can feel better – you just have to take that first step.

If you are in crisis or need immediate help please call 911 or 1-800-273-TALK (8255), or go to the nearest Emergency Department for help and an evaluation.